There were many outstanding moments from Thursday’s Autism Hive NI conference but this one quote stopped me in my tracks.
"All I needed was one person to believe in me.
That one person changed the whole trajectory of my life"
It made think "Have I been that person for someone?"
The story of a teenage girl I supported floods back into my mind.
She had to leave her school setting due to bullying. She struggled massively with her self worth and hated her diagnosis of Autism. Over and over she would say to me "What is the point? I am going to amount to nothing."
What a heartbreaking thing to heart. Yet at times I found it deeply frustrating too as she initially refused to be involved in anything.
Focusing on building a positive relationship with her was key. For my team this was learning all about the boyband sensation BTS. I mean I forced myself to listen to their songs on my drive home to work and watched multiple interviews with them. If that's what it took to relate, that's what we would do.
The next step was to build her self confidence. This was a daily procesess. A game of inches, edging forward little by little. At the beginning there were so many panic attacks and meltdowns. For many years she had been masking and she was journeying through trauma as well. Now she was in an environment where the mask could be taken off and she felt safe enough to process some of the trauma.
Shewas phenomenal at art. I suggested she led an art club for the younger children in school and whilst initially received with a grunt and a sigh, it became her favourite thing. She would confidently go round the younger classes collecting the children who had signed up, set up in the art room in preparation and even made lesson plans. Each day I had the privilege of witnessing of her self-acceptance grow. Fast forward a few years and she was someone I found so much inspiration in. Shewas one of my young people I could depend on, she sat GCSEs, worked part time in a cafe and would take weekend trips to London with her classmates. 

Today, in my living room hangs the Beyoncé Coachella album drawn from hand by her as my leaving gift. On the bottom it says ‘Thank you for believing in me, I didn’t think I was worth loving and never imagined I would be where I am today.’
This story is not shared to blow my own trumpet. Her journey, with it's heartaches and joys, challenges and triumphs belongs to her.
I share this to remind you that you too can be the ‘one’ in that persons story, even if the picture today is full of frustration and distress. Whether it is your child, a child you are supporting in youth club or a child in your class you are teaching, you can make a life long difference.
Take time to build the relationship. Work hard now to build up the trust so in the months to come you can talk about the tricky stuff! You can be the ‘one’ in someone’s story.