I am not a football fan, I know nothing about football. However, as someone who plays sport I thoroughly enjoy a sports documentary on any sort. I love the stories and the psychology behind it all. 

When ‘Welcome to Wrexham’ came onto Disney plus I was completely sucked in (I mean Ryan Reynolds being involved as the new club owner was an attraction). The second season has been released just recently and I popped on the second episode of season 2 on my lunch break yesterday as an easy watch.

3 minutes in I was crying. 

This episode follows Paul Mullins (one of the football players) journey with his 3 ½ year old son Albi who has been diagnosed with Autism.

The episode also follows a teenage fan, Millie who also has a diagnosis of Autism.
I was floored as Paul Mullins and Millie’s mum so perfectly expressed the challenges, the emotions, the grief, the joy you experience in raising an Autistic child. 

Paul expresses the complexity of emotions around it. How Albie was hitting all the milestones in the first few months and then suddenly began to regress, he was no longer copying or trying to make sounds. Albie is non verbal and Paul expresses the guilt he feels in not being able to understand his son's needs when he is struggling. 

Millie’s mum expresses the heartbreak behind raising a child who has never said the words ‘Mum I love you’ who doesn’t seek affection. 
In the same breath, both Paul and Millie's Mum then say ‘I wouldn’t change them for the world’. 

Maybe these comments sound familiar, maybe they are thoughts that you have been too scared to voice. Fear, grief, anxiety, anger, denial, guilt, confusion, frustration. These are all emotions that you may have or are experiencing as you journey through the world of Autism.
The journey of diagnosis is an exhausting one and extremely emotional one.   

I have had the privilege this week to lead two separate training sessions on this topic ‘The Diagnosis journey’ in various parts of Northern Ireland. Within that we had some of these conversations with parents and carers. The same conversation that Paul and Millie’s mother were having, the expression of conflicting emotions and the same fierce love expressed in every word. I have held back the tears as I have heard the grief, the exhaustion and the deep and at times unrequited love that you as parents/carers might face on this journey.

If you can, watch season 2 episode 2 of ‘Welcome to Wreckham’. Let it and this newsletter  resonate with you that you are not alone in this journey, in these complex mix of emotions.

This week for me has been a crazy one. Filming with the national lottery, training principals in England and Wales, being live on BBC radio Ulster and delivering training sessions in Derry, Bangor and Newry. But I have felt a shift this week. I think that is why I found that episode so deeply emotional. Change is coming. 10 years ago you would NEVER have switched on the radio and heard someone speaking about Autism, you would never have been watching a football documentary on such a large platform like Disney plus and a whole episode be dedicated to Autism! We have a long, long way to go but hold onto these moments of hope that acceptance is slowly happening for our amazing neurodiverse children and young people!